Crosses

Every person on this planet has baggage. Every person has things that they deal with on a daily basis that no one in the world knows about. These are things that I call "crosses". Worldly worries, such as mortgage payments, insurance, relationships, health issues, etc., make up these crosses. These worldly crosses are different from the Cross of Christ. Jesus said to lay our cares (little C crosses) on him because his yoke is easy and his burden is light. We are called to carry the Cross and give Christ our crosses. So many times though we lay down the Cross of Christ and lug our crosses around instead.

All of this talk about crosses comes from a late night conversation that I had with a friend the other night over Facebook chat during a bout of insomnia. (That is a crazy long sentence but I can't figure out how to break it up!) We were talking about life and the circumstances that we face and how through it all we are constantly looking for someone who is willing to share this crazy, beautiful life with us. From that we started talking about relationships and things that hold us back. We talked about how we constantly tell other people that they shouldn't let their baggage or "crosses" get in the way of a relationship, when we are constantly doing exactly that with our own relationships.

I know exactly what it is that holds me back in every relationship! There are a number of things but two things hold me back in particular. The first and largest thing is my health. My life and my future are a whole bunch of unknowns! I could have to have another transplant in the future, I have no immune system and am at a higher risk for cancer than the normal population, having children then something happening and leaving a single mother and a child to continue living. Then there is my past! Yes we all have one and mine is fairly tame, but there was a point in my life where I did some things that I am not proud of today. It is easy to be open about my health because there is no way to hide it, but my past is a different story. I can keep it under lock and key for the most part!

I say all of this to say that I am a hypocrite! I can give some killer advice and never take it for myself! The good thing about having a loving Savior and a merciful God is that through that hypocrisy, I can grow in Him.

In this conversation, it was brought up about how it was hard for this person to get over some things that have happened to them in their life. In trying to help them and consel them in the best way that I could, I gave the following advice:

In my life, God has told me that I can choose to either carry His cross or carry my own. Because we have free will, it is our choice as to which one we take. The catch is that we must take one! I can carry all of my crosses around and let them drag me down. Because they are all small crosses they can only be used as an anchor though.

My second option is to take up His cross. His cross is huge and it is going to stand out. People are going to notice it when you are walking around with His Cross. Even if I choose to take up The Cross of Christ, it can be used in two ways. It is big enough though that I can use it as a staff to help me up and over the mountain which is how Christ intends for it to be used. The second option is for me to use it as an anchor to drag me back down. It is up to me how I use His Cross but either way He and the Cross are with me until the end. If I want to sit down on him, His Cross can be a ball and chain. If I want to work for him, I can use it to help me. In the end though it is my decision.

My hope and my goal is to lay down all of my crosses at the feet of Jesus and take up His Cross. When I take up His Cross, I am promised help, safe keeping, and comfort in time of need. If I carry around my crosses, I am almost guaranteed worry, troubles, and hard times. Seems like an easy decision to make, but it becomes a hard one to follow through on.